A preschooler’s wet bed is more common than you think.  

Are you dreading your preschooler’s first sleepover invite, because he still wears a nappy?  Take heart. Bedwetting is so common that there are probably other kids in your child’s class who bedwet and whose parents keep it a secret too.  Here are expert answers to the questions you may be too embarrassed to ask.

Is it normal that my 5-year-old still wets the bed?

Bedwetting is a condition that shouldn’t set off alarm bells, but many parents are naturally concerned if their child still wets the bed past the age of 3. Most cases of bedwetting are attributed to physical causes—the child’s bladder control mechanism simply just isn’t mature enough.  According to Dr, Spock, only 2 to 3% of children still wet their beds at 12 years of age. Spock says that, as long as your child is growing well physically and psychologically without any other symptoms, gaining night-time bladder control will gradually happen in time.

Why does bedwetting actually happen?

Genetics can play a part in bedwetting. In Toddler Taming, Dr Christopher Green says that: “Delay in bladder training at night seems to have an extremely strong genetic relationship. Some studies show almost 70% of bed-wetters have a parent or a sibling with a similar problem.” It also seems to affect boys more than girls. Other reasons are that your child’s brain isn’t getting consistent messages to ‘get up and go to the bathroom’ once their bladder is full.  Another reason could be deep sleeping pattern—your child sleeps so soundly that his brain doesn’t respond to the bladder’s messages.

When does a child achieve bladder control?

Children achieve bladder control at different ages. By the age of 6 years, most children no longer wet the bed. However, bedwetting up to the age of 6 is not unusual, even though it may be frustrating, not to mention expensive, for parents.

What effect does bedwetting have on the child?

When kids hit the 7 to 8 year old mark, those who continue to wet their beds feel embarrassed and guilty about their condition.  These children may withdraw from social activities and suffer from a low self-image.  It doesn’t help if they are often criticized by frustrated parents. Dr. Spock says, “Since avoiding or lessening shame and self-doubt is important … both mother and father should look for opportunities to build lasting self-esteem in the child…[and] maintain an interest in their child’s attempts to remain dry, expressing pleasure when success occurs and encouragement when he fails.” 

Help your child with these strategies:

• Ditch the diapers.  The nappies on the market work a little too well and don’t allow your child to feel the discomfort of being wet.  Let your child wear regular undies.
• Establish a pattern.  Make sure your child has a consistent bedtime and that you limit his liquid intake at least 2 hours before bed.  
• Make sure he relieves himself before going to bed, even if he doesn’t feel the need to.
• Bedwetting or moisture alarms are now available.   The alarm wakes the child up once it senses wetness, so he can rush to the bathroom and relieve himself.  This conditions the brain to respond during sleep to messages from the bladder.
• Try night-conditioning—consistently get your child up at night to use the bathroom.  Be patient, and try to find a good hour when he responds best to being awakened.
• Dr T Brazelton, author of Toilet Training the Brazelton Way and Clinical Professor of Paediatrics Emeritus at Harvard Medical School, suggests trying to adopt a team approach with your child’s school and coordinate efforts and strategies. 
  

Get your toddler to share the load by turning chores into fun.

Divvying up chores in which little ones can participate not only teaches them to appreciate you, but empowers them to feel needed instead of needy. And if no one alerts them to the notion that houswork is drudgery, it won’t be.

For many young kids, cleaning isn’t a chore but an extension of play. You get to sneak it learning life skills too—independence, gross motor movement, precision, frustration tolerance, and the cognitive ability to count, sort, match and classify.

The earlier you get kids involved, the better,” says Tricia K. Neppl, PhD, a researcher at the Institute for Social and Behavioral Research at Iowa State University. “It’s easier at this age, because toddlers are very eager to help and they think chores are fun. Helping Mommy and Daddy makes them feel confident and useful.”

Here are ways to get your child to pitch in and take those first empowered steps towards independence:

Break up tasks into simple steps

Start by giving your little ones easy to follow instructions like:

• After coloring, count your crayons and put them away in this special box or can.
• After playing with your toys, please put them back on this shelf or in the toy box.
• Could you help by wiping your part of the table with this cloth after you eat? 

The simpler the instructions are to follow, the more achievable they’ll be, and the more important your child will feel as a member of the household.

Have the forbearance for lengthy processes

Taking over a task or asking someone else to redo your child’s chores to speed things up could undermine your child’s self-esteem.  “He’ll feel like he’s not good enough or that he’s letting you down,” explains Amy Needham, PhD, associate professor of psychology and neuroscience at Duke University, in Durham, North Carolina. Resist the temptation by giving your child plenty of time to work at his own pace.

Follow his lead

You’ll most likely get the cooperation you need if you go with your child’s natural inclinations. He likes the dirt of the garden? Get him a watering can and shovel. If he likes the wet of the sink, hand him some rags and a water spray bottle. Others like the soothing enjoyment of repetition (sweeping, slicing, dusting).

Turn the job into a game

Here are some ways to make tasks more exciting for your toddler:

• Sorting colors - Tell your child you’ll pick up all the green and blue toys if she puts away all the yellow and red ones.
• Fun on the Clock - Using a timer, see how many toys you can both put away in three minutes. The person who stashed the most when the timer goes off gets a big hug.
• Match ‘Em - Give children a pile of socks to pair while you fold clothes. You get willing company while you do your own chores.
• Water Play - Kids can give plants and pets water with a watering can and some direction. If they spill, use the chance to let them wipe it up.
• Sous Chef - Toddlers love cooking. They’re too young to do most meal preps, but they can use the salad spinner, put rolls in a basket, or place napkins on the table.

Chore time doesn’t have to be a bore.  If you get your kids started and involved at this age when they think everything is a potentially fun experience while keeping in mind that the path to independence is not especially straight (or tidy), you’ll have a regular Tom Sawyer or Laura Ingalls on your hands sooner or later.

Children’s food allergies are unpredictable, and misinterpreting them could be deadly. Learn to separate fact from fiction.

MYTH:  Children are allergic to any kind of food that causes a negative reaction.

FACT: Many negative food reactions are unrelated to food allergies and are simply food sensitivities.  True food allergies are not as common as people think and only affect 2% of children. Lactose intolerance, for instance, is different from a milk allergy. Doctors say a milk allergy would have life threatening consequences and those that are allergic to milk would have to skip milk protein all together.  A real food allergy is a reaction of the body’s immune system to a certain component, usually a protein, in a food or ingredient.

Symptoms of food allergies can include watery eyes, wheezing and difficulty breathing, coughing, skin rashes, sneezing, vomiting, diarrhea and swelling around the mouth and throat.  The more severe reaction is anaphylaxis, which involves enlarging of the larynx and a choking sensation that can lead to death. 

The top 4 food allergens for children are peanuts (which are not true nuts but actually legumes from the bean and pea family), tree nuts (walnuts, peacans, cashews etc.), cow’s milk, and eggs (especially egg whites). Peanut allergies may be the most likely to cause life-threatening allergic reactions (anaphylaxis), but a cow’s milk allergy is the most common food allergy in young children. 

MYTH: Children with allergies have them at the onset of birth.

FACT:  While most food allergies begin at the onset of birth or early childhood, they can develop anytime in a person’s life. Interestingly, experts suspect that our society has become “cleaner” and healthier, which may be causing the immune systems in some children to fail in differentiating real threats from harmless invaders, such as food. Some also believe that because immune systems are no longer fighting real threats, they overreact and shift to turn on the body’s own tissues.  

It’s good to note, however,  that many children actually outgrow their food allergies. Some children can outgrow their food allergies if they eliminate them from their diet for two to three years. Approximately 85% of children outgrow their allergy to milk, but fewer will outgrow their allergies to peanuts, tree nuts and shellfish.

MYTH:  Giving your child small amounts of food that he is allergic to helps him build up a resistance to the allergy.

FACT: On the contrary, if your child develops adverse reactions to certain foods, you must try to eliminate them from your child’s diet as soon as possible.  Many children outgrow their food allergies if they completely avoid them for two to three years. If your child has multiple food allergies, eliminate all food he is allergic to, and rotate all other foods every four to five days.  

MYTH:  You can prevent a food allergy.

FACT:  In pediatric allergy circles, this is a subject of much debate. Although women are often advised to avoid certain foods, such as peanuts, when they’re pregnant or breastfeeding, no one can say for sure that if this will lower a child’s risk of allergies. 

What is known is that children who have parents with food allergies are more predisposed to allergies.  There is also general agreement that strictly breastfeeding newborns and only introducing cow’s milk after your child’s first birthday has a protective effect. Breastfed children are less likely to develop eczema (a rash that’s often considered the first sign that a child is allergy-prone).

A hypoallergenic infant formula should be used if your baby needs a milk supplement.  If your child is more predisposed to food allergies, only introduce  solids after the sixth month of life – eggs after your child turns 2 and peanuts (only as smooth as peanut butter) and shellfish when your child is at least 3 years old. Introduce new foods slowly (i.e, every four to five days) so that you can easily identify which foods cause a reaction or allergy.

They may not say it, but they can sign it.  

It’s not too late to teach sign language to your toddler. Many toddlers can’t speak clearly until they are 3 or 4 years old. And those who can speak may not be able to get their tongue around certain words and letters. Signing can fill those language gaps.

Signing also appeals to a toddler’s predominantly visual and physical learning style. Children master hand control before they gain tongue control. Logically then, babies and toddlers will learn hand gestures and signs before they are able to speak the actual words clearly.

As sure as your toddler’s language development is her strong desire to communicate with you right now.  So regardless of whether your toddler is still not talking, babbling or can speak in phrases, sign language will offer many benefits:

Fewer frustrations

Signing offers a specificity that toddlers cannot always manage with the spoken word. The guessing and questioning part is reduced on your end, and tantrums are minimized. With sign language, it does not matter if she’s babbling incoherently, because you will understand the gesturing.

A stronger bond

The earlier communication is nurtured, the earlier a relationship is enriched. Since sign language requires attention, you and your child are forced to be in the moment with each other more often. 

Faster language development

Most people are concerned that signing will delay speech development in a baby. Fortunately, studies have proven the reverse: sign language facilitates speech development, expands vocabulary and improves literacy. This is because parents tend to label items more and repeat the words as they teach the signs.

An intellectual boost

Sign language develops fine and gross motor skills, which are critical for language and cognition. Studies have consistently shown that signing helps improve memory and facilitates creative thinking and meaningful learning in a child. 

So hurry, and give your toddler something to sign about.

Useful words

• Juice – with your pinky finger, draw a letter “J” in the air
• Milk – open and close fists as if you’re milking a cow
• Cracker – knock one elbow with the other fist
• Finished/All done – with both hands open and facing you, shake outwards twice
• Eat/Food – with fingers in one hand touching together, make a sign as if you’re putting food in your mouth
• More – put your fingertips together using both hands
• Share – hold one hand out and use the other to divide it out in sweeping motions
• Play – with both hands in a fist, stick out pinky and thumb and shake it
• Please – move your flat right hand on your chest in clockwise motion
• Sorry – move your closed fist on your chest in clockwise motion with a “sorry” face
• Nice/Clean – move one flat hand over the other, move faster or twice to indicate “clean”
• Want – with both hands open and facing up in front of you, bring your hands toward you
• Go – with your index fingers, point to the direction you want to go
• Thirsty – with your index finger, trace a line going down your throat
• Happy – brush a flat hand over your heart while smiling
• Hurt/Pain – rub the fingertips of your index fingers together with a sad face

Useful phrases

• Outside/outdoors/ to go out – start with your hand open at the side of your face then close it as you move it farther sideways, do twice to mean “outside”
• I love you – stick out your thumb, pinky and index fingers or just cross your arms over your chest then point to the one you ‘love’
• Brush teeth – use the index finger of your right hand to brush your teeth in a side to side horizontal motion
• Thank you – with a flat hand of your dominant hand, start with your fingers near your lips and move your hand forward and a bit down in the direction of the person you are thanking.  Smile. Very similar and sometimes also used as “good”

Here are the answers to all your pregnancy nutrition worries.

As you go through your pregnancy, no doubt the unsolicited advice from everyone and their mother have put you in a conundrum—for every fact, you will find a contradictory one. We demystify common misconceptions and help you tell apart fact from myth.

Your officemates say: Eat up, you’re eating for two.


Sorry, you need to put back that extra serving of  pudding. The biggest myth is that it is okay to eat more during pregnancy because you are eating for two.  Chef, cookbook author, and food, health and travel writer Catherine Jones and perinatal nutritionist and dietician Rose Ann Hudson, authors of the newly updated book Eating For Pregnancy, stress that you are carefully eating for one, and you should increase calorie intake to 300 calories a day – the equivalent of one cooked chicken breast. Remember that you are eating primarily for you, and just a little bit more for a tiny someone, who at full-term, is small enough to fit in the crook of your arm.

Your Mom says: Forget the salt – you don’t want to swell up.

Normal sodium intake of 2,300 mg daily does not make you swell up, but excessive consumption can cause water retention and swelling, particularly in the ankles. And while a little swelling is normal in pregnancy, swelling combined with high blood pressure can be a symptom of preeclampsia and requires immediate medical attention. Rule of thumb – salt your food to taste. It is still and essential nutrient.

Your best friends say: It’s ok to eat a little less, because your baby will just feed off your fat stores.

Pregnancy is NO time to diet. Adequate calories, vitamins, minerals, fats, and protein ensure healthy fetal development and delivery. Depriving your baby of essential nutrients can result in low-birth weight and other complications. Inadequate protein will force your body to break down tissues (muscle) to feed the baby, and your health will suffer. The only source of protein your baby has is from the food you eat.

Your favorite aunt says: Eat a low-fat diet to keep the extra weight off.

Low-fat diets can be extremely dangerous in pregnancy, because most foods considered “fatty” are good sources of protein, such as eggs, meats and cheese. During pregnancy, it’s important to eat a balanced diet that includes plenty of good fat. For instance, DHA omega-3 fatty acids from fish and supplements form the building blocks of your baby’s brain, particularly during the third trimester. Be sure your diet includes mono- and polyunsaturated fats from plant oils and fish sources.  

Your dear grandmother says: A fish diet will ensure a perfectly healthy baby.

Maybe in your grandma’s time, yes. If only our waters weren’t so polluted today and the resulting mercury content in some fish weren’t toxic to babies.  Methyl mercury, primarily found in large fish (such as tuna, swordfish, tilefish, and king mackerel), can contain high levels of mercury. Smaller fish, like salmon and grouper (lapu-lapu) are all safe to eat during pregnancy. Fish high in omega-3s (such as salmon, sardines, trout, herring, and halibut) are essential for healthy brain development. Bottom line: Don’t eliminate fish from your diet, but make smart choices.

Do you live under the dictatorship of a little child? Learn how to respond when your preschooler thinks she is the boss of you.

Bossiness is inherent to preschoolers. It kicks in, because their vocabulary is growing and they are just now in the process of breaking into the social world with little or no understanding about consideration and respect for other people’s opinions.  And of course, let’s not forget that they’ve been bossed around all their lives by their parents.  Telling people what to do, therefore, has been incorporated into their world view.  Being bossy is normal, natural, part of the way the world works.

But try to picture your child barking orders every five minutes, and you’ll have a future where your little bossypants is either friendless or the class bully. Left uncorrected, in five years’ time, you could be stuck with a teen that’s gotten her way for so long that you are no longer in control of her behavior.

Laying down the law

Bossiness is usually just a phase.  It is often the reflection of a strong-willed personality, and if chanelled properly, can be an asset. This requires careful management.  Here are ways to break the cycle:

Don’t take orders.  When your child makes demands of you, don’t give in just for the sake of peace and quiet.  Remind her to ask nicely, and respond only when her manner is appropriate.

Mind your reaction. Young children love playing to an audience, so don’t encourage her by laughing when she is disrespectful. The life expectancy for other people finding her bossiness “cute” is short-lived.

Pay attention. Observe and spend more time with your child.  Many times, the bossy syndrome is a sign that your child wants more alone time with you.

Investigate.  Find out when your child becomes bossy.  Is it with adults or with children? Does she become bossy with familiar people or even with strangers?  Do people reinforce the behavior by laughing and giving in to her demands instantly?

Teach manners, if you haven’t already.  Remind her constantly to say “please” and “thank you”. Make sure she knows how to wait for her turn and is given many opportunities to learn how to share.

Point out when your child is being bossy so she can catch herself doing it, and offer an alternative.  If she can’t take the alternative, she needs an appropriate consequence.  (“If you can’t let your brother do what he wants with the legos, then you’re going to have to choose something else.”) 

Give your child choices. Over-controlling parents who insist on one way of dressing or are unrelenting in their choice of music will only encourage their child to model this domineering behavior with their peers.  Choices teach her not to be absolute in her opinions and that there is more than one way of doing things.

Limit competition. If your child’s bossiness is a real issue, expose her also to the joys of non-competitive games (try puzzles) and sports.

Specify the non-negotiables.  You need not get into absurd power struggles about what book she wants to read or the kind of juice she wants in her cup.  But when it comes to the car seat, a bike helmet, insect repellent, sunscreen, and other safety measures, let her know that she has no choice in the matter.

Stick to your guns. Even if you are exhausted, you must stand your ground. Your corrections will pay off in the end.  Don’t expect them to change overnight, or even in a year.  But do expect to see progress. 

First time was a charm, but now that you want a second child…or a third…it’s taking forever.  What’s going on?

You’ve tried everything – rhythmic timing, hormones, IVF. You’ve even gyrated to the music of some exotic fertility dance. Meanwhile, your older child is in grade school pleading every day for a baby sibling. 

It turns out an easy first pregnancy does not equate with easy conception the second time around. Struggling with this condition – known as secondary infertility – is often a long and disappointing road. The age of the woman is a major factor when trying to conceive. Fertility potential reaches its peak at 35 years old, and declines sharply after that.  It then becomes harder to get pregnant with every year that passes.

Other common explanations for secondary infertility include:

• Ovulation problems
• Endometriosis
• Pelvic adhesions
• Uterine fibroids or polyps

The same factors affecting primary infertility also come into play. Factors that affect egg production or sperm quality, or transport of the sperm to meet the egg will affect chances of getting pregnant again.

The first step is to test the couple to determine if the woman is ovulating, her tubes are open and the man’s sperm is plentiful. Depending on the identified cause of infertility, assisted reproductive techniques are offered, ranging from ovulation induction with timed intercourse, artificial insemination, or in vitro fertilization.

The emotional upshot

Secondary infertility is actually more prevalent than primary infertility, but couples are less likely to seek treatment for this condition.  It is not unusual for a second pregnancy to become a matter of obsession. Caught between the world of larger families and childless couples, joy over the child they have and heartbreak over the ones they don’t, the experience of parents who cannot overcome secondary infertility is uniquely painful. They worry about their only child who will never know what it’s like to grow up with siblings. This inability to produce siblings for the existing son or daughter frequently leads to guilt.

Suffering one or more miscarriages is also a common scenario when dealing with secondary infertility. Naturally, couples also have to contend with feelings of grief and loss.

On another level, the grieving couple may isolate themselves from friends who have more than one child due to feelings of jealousy and pain. It is completely normal for women to feel resentment towards others who were able to conceive more than once.

Since secondary infertility is often unrecognized as a problem, couples may feel tentative about seeking support and communicating their feelings, afraid they may be perceived as ungrateful for the child they have already.

Differences on how to cope and whether to accept the situation as such may affect a couple’s relationship. When this hits crisis level, professional help from a marriage counselor or a psychotherapist is necessary.

Embracing the established family

Once both parents have accepted that they are facing secondary infertility, they will need to make more decisions as a couple—primarily about whether to treat the problem at all and, if so, when to end it.

It will be necessary to talk to one’s child, and to do so in a manner that is age-appropriate.  No doubt he or she has felt the fall-out of this emotional journey and may have thoughts or feelings to express.

Though there may be discontentment, with counseling and communication, couples learn in time to accept and focus on their nuclear family of three and channel their energies to raising their only child well.

Here are reassuring reasons for baffling baby behaviors.

When you’re a brand new and freaked-out parent, nothing is obvious.  Your little bundle of joy may be the light and love of your life, but there will be things about her behavior that your sleep-deprived brain will find utterly baffling. These behaviors range from the truly bizarre to the incredibly lovable.

Here are explanations to some key baby behaviors that will encourage you to enjoy everything unique about this fleeting stage.

Why do babies grasp with an iron fist?

Your baby’s grasp might as well be a pair handcuffs—she can’t let go, and it’s tough to pull away. A baby’s grasping reflex is one of the first she’s born with.  It’s strong enough to support her weight for a few moments.  Research suggests that this reflex action comes from primates. Another study showed that when infants hold onto their mothers, their heartbeats slow down, suggesting that they feel calm and secure in Mommy’s presence.

Why do some babies fight sleep or wake up just when you think you can unwind?

The newness of existence in all its glory is the reason your newborn will fight sleep with the ferocity of a Tasmanian devil.  Sleep is boring and overrated, thinks your child.  Separation anxiety from the parents also keeps a baby crying.  And as she hasn’t figured out the concept of Night and Day yet, your baby will sleep whenever she feels like it.  One key factor is hunger.  Your baby’s stomach can hold just enough milk to keep her satisfied for 3-4 hours.  So be prepared for lots of sleepless night feedings

Why are babies veritable drool dispensers?

Is your baby starting to remind your of the neighborhood bulldog? A baby begins to drool when tooth buds under the gums sprout into teeth. Your baby’s teeth are already traveling upward at that point, and this initiates saliva production.  Unlike adults, it doesn’t occur to them to swallow excess saliva just yet. Drool also neutralizes stomach acid, soothes any irritation in the esophageal lining and activates enzymes that help your little tyke digest solid food.

Why do some babies tripod before they sit up straight?

We may take actions like sitting for granted, but try doing it if all your limbs had the rigidity of a marionette. Tripoding (plopped on the rump with arms straight out in front, hands flat on the floor like a sitting doggie) is a way for a baby to sit up unaided before she has the balance to sit without support.

Why do babies hit themselves?

While it may be an outlet for frustration or the irritation of teething, for young babies, the mere fact that they CAN hit themselves is some times be the only reason for doing it. They are gaining control of their body and might actually find slapping their tummy, for example, highly entertaining.

Why do some babies form attachments to blankets, stuffed toys and other fuzzy things? 

It’s all about familiarity—everything from the milky smell, a frayed satin edge, to that threadbare look gives your baby security and peace.  Resist the temptation to re-stuff a lumpy pillow or patch up a blanket that looks like it’s gone through a shredder. Its tattered state is precisely what makes it a comfort object. Babies who form an attachment to things are emotionally trying to make the world a less daunting place, substituting their parent’s absence for a constant item.  Unknowingly, they are teaching themselves self-soothing skills, an important developmental milestone.

Help your child find the starter-pet that’s perfect for your family

It’s the perfect age to own a pet. But finding the right pet for your child and entire family is not an easy choice. You have to consider how much free time you generally have, how much you’re willing to clean up, how much space you have in and outside your house, how often you’re gone, and how much you’re willing to spend on your pet’s care, feeding, and maintenance.  

Before diving in, do your research: speak to a vet, an animal breeder, and friends who own pets before deciding on a particular animal. If you are thinking about getting a dog or cat, the Petcare Information and Advisory Service will advise you on the breed best suited for your family and lifestyle.

Here are some popular beginner pets.

Goldfish

Sure, they swim around in their own waste and live immersed in germs—but it all happens behind glass. 

The humble goldfish is ideal for kids who are brand-new to pet ownership. A popular “starter pet,” the hardy goldfish can live in cold water with no heater or filter.  The only catch is that fish are one of those pets you spend a lot of time and energy on just trying to keep them alive.

Small mammals

These pets won’t break the bank and don’t require much more maintenance than your child can manage. They need no walking, minimal cleaning and can live quite happily on family food scraps.  Ideal for families who want a pet but aren’t ready for a cat or dog. They are especially good in homes where everyone is gone during the day.  Hamsters, guinea pigs, mice, rats, gerbils and rabbits are all good choices.

Dog

This is for the child who wants a more interactive pet and develops strong bonds. The canine-human relationship is particularly intense.  Remember though, dogs require the most care of any domestic animal. It would be unrealistic to expect even your well-intentioned child to always remember to fill the bowl or walk the dog.  Breeds most temperamentally suited for children are the Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Cocker Spaniel, Golden Retriever, Great Dane, Labrador Retriever, Maltese/ ShihTzu cross,  Pug, and Whippet.

Cat

Cats are good companions and perfect for the child who doesn’t mind being snubbed occasionally. “When selecting a cat, look for one that purrs and lets you hold him,” says Nancy Frensley, an animal behaviorist and trainer for the Berkeley East Bay Humane Society, in Berkeley, California. Be wary of cats or kittens that bite or hiss. Consider Abyssinian, Birman, Burmese, Manx, Persian, Ragdoll and Somali.

Bird

They trash cages like a rock star in a hotel room, but  true animal enthusiasts will love these colorful and active pets.  Birds can be very social, but it takes time and patience to train them, so they’re not right for all kids. 

Be sure you select a bird by temperament rather than color, because personality varies widely by species. And prepare for a real commitment: Birds can live a long time. Canaries, finches, parakeets, cockatiels, pyrrhura conures, parrots and love birds are reasonably priced, reasonably sized, and just plain reasonable to live with.

*Because most, if not all, reptiles carry salmonella in their digestive tracks, they are generally not recommended for homes with children under age 5 or with family members with serious health conditions.

Improving your fertility after 35 is possible with a few lifestyle changes.

Making babies is the most natural thing in the world. It is also sometimes the hardest.

Unfortunately, women’s eggs have a shelf life.  Women are born with a million eggs in stock—a number that declines to about 300,000 after puberty.   At the age of 35, the window of opportunity for having a perfectly healthy, full-term pregnancy becomes smaller.  Eggs become more susceptible to  genetic defects like Down’s Syndrome, and the risk of miscarriage is greater.

Age also affects our pituitary gland’s ability to produce  the Follicle Stimulating Hormone (FSH) which controls the development of eggs during the menstrual cycle. Fertility doctors will usually test a woman’s FSH levels. 

Improving fertility 

Thankfully, there are simple steps you can take to stack the fertility odds in your favor without invasive interventions. 

Avoid excessive exercise or dieting.  Stay fit, but don’t overdo it.  Some professional athletes or crash dieters  complain of missed periods (amenorrhea). Nutritional imbalance caused by restrictive diets that cut out entire food groups and very low body fat percentage make conception problematic.

Stay within normal weight range.  Obesity can affect fertility.  Fat cells can cause insulin resistance and actually produce estrogen, which tricks the body into lowering the hormones that lead to ovulation.  Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS)—a hormonal imbalance that affects the ability to conceive—is strongly linked to obesity. Overweight women can also be susceptible to miscarriage, gestational diabetes and other complications. Doctors advise women to get into a weight loss program about 1 or 2 years before trying to get pregnant. 

Detoxify your system. Toxins accumulate over the years through exposure to pollution, usage of body care products and cosmetics etc., and end up damaging  our systems. In order to rid your body of undesirable elements, consult with a physician for detoxification, and boost your intake of vitamin-rich foods.

Hold the alcohol and caffeine: Alcohol consumption disturbs estrogen levels, thereby hampering egg implantation. Restrict your intake to an occasional glass of wine or give it up altogether. Caffeine increases your chances of an early miscarriage. If you cannot love without coffee, limit to a single cup.

Quit smoking: Smoking directly impacts fertility. Quitting dramatically increases your chances of conception.  Cigarette smoking is harmful to a woman’s ovaries, increases risks of genetic abnormalities and miscarriage.

Ease stress.  A 2005 study conducted by the  University of California at San Diego shows that women who had scored highest on a stress test ovulated 20% fewer eggs than those who had less stress.   Excessive stress results in suppression of the menstrual cycle and irregular ovulation. Fertility clinics recommend engaging in relaxation techniques like massage therapy, yoga, and acupuncture.

Know your cycle. Know the days you are fertile. Your fertile period starts about 4-5 days before ovulation, and ends about 24-48 hours after it. Consider purchasing a fertility monitor. An ovulation monitor will indicate when you are fertile and when you aren’t.

Go herbal. Herbs are considered to be a natural fertility medication. Consult a registered naturopath who can recommend herbal medications suitable for your body. Herbs help balance hormone levels and cleanse the system of fertility damaging toxins. Herbs help in normalizing menstrual cycles, reduce premenstrual syndrome and regulate ovulation.

Boost your man’s health: The same things that harm your fertility can affect your husband’s reproductive health. Cigarettes, alcohol, a poor diet—any of these can contribute to lower sperm production or motility (ability to swim). Remember a man’s body takes 90 days to produce new sperm, and following a healthy regime can help in producing healthy sperms.

Usually between 10 and 12 months would be a pretty good standard before seeking an evaluation for infertility from a specialist.